Thursday, October 23, 2008
I got my 23rd bday present from dear even b4 my bday. ahah.. and he got me a limited edition RED DS LITE!!! Woo!!! this is totally red. not like those abit of red then all black. haha.. since is limited edition thats y he bought my present so early worrying that it will be out of stock hence thot of giving me earlier..haha... wanted to post it earlier but forgot abt it.. heez.. thank dear!!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
yar its 3mth.. so fast i am working for 3mths le.. still got how many XYZ years to work. work till i die.. alot of thots and feelings after 3mths here. how disgusting working life can be and how bad a human can be. Like wat my mum always tell me "One type of rice breed millions type of people", how true rite. I met good pple like my "mummy" and i meet extremely bad people like the "eunuch". I can say that my job itself actually is interesting and will have chance to travel but all thanx to this "eunuch", i am even been deprive from learning things. Recalling what i have learn for the past 3 mths, i feel that i oni learn laboratory technique or those test methods. I shd also be learning abt my product and how to make formulations but guess i am stupid to the "eunuch" so i learn nuts on them. probably my expectations are too high i am not sure abt it.
today a small incident happen. actuali is seriously nth too serious. but dunno y i seems to be abit affected by it. it makes me think i am reali stupid? is the "eunuch" correct that i am stupid? or is it i am inexperienced? or i am not putting enuff effort and not meticulous enuff? i am pretty confused now....
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
y does things always have to happen in this manner.. haiz... am i reali so problematic? am i reali so demanding? am i taking things for granted.. haiz..y am i always complaining. isit wat all gals do? or isit oni me? y am i always the person that is feeling deprived. wats wrong. maybe i am reali the problem. y am i like that. sometimes i reali hate myself.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
My first job..
first of all i finali and officially graduated from NUS. this mark an end of my study life. use to be so looking forward to come out and work so as to run away from examinations but now i sort of have a different feeling. today is my third day of work. i worked as a research chemist. yes the designation sounds nice but well i feel it is a very stressful job. its oni the third day and i feel the stress or rather the 1st day i already feel it this way. my department is pretty small. besides me there are 2 other chemists and both are ladies. a guy which i dunno wat he does and 2 manager. the person i am reporting is a manager and he is also new to the company. he oni came here in march. at 1st i am not reali scared of him but dunno y as time passes and as i hear more from my colleague the fear in me grew. i am worried that i am not gd enuff cos i jolly well neo that my chemistry knowledge sucks big time. some how i feel abit lost probably i am still new... i dunno.. i juz hope this type of feeling will fade away.
oh yar and i juz got to neo from my colleague that actuali when they are choosing for a person to come in they actuali haf another person in mind. he has an honours and this is wat boss is looking for. so well i am oni a deg holder and i am his 2nd choice. so this guy happen to reject this job and this is the reason y i got this job. sounds abit sad but well this is 1 fact of life. if u r not the better 1 u will be the 2nd choice. now probably i understand y he keep saying that as long as i try he is hapi enuff. haiz.. i also dunno.
for this 3 days i always wake up in the morning feeling veri reluctant to go to work. i reali hate this feeling and this week pass exceptionally slow for me. and the boss actuali asked me if i did cont to look for other job when i am informed i am selected and i say no and he look abit shocked. i guess probably i shd cos maybe i am juz not suitable.
in this company i will be on 1yr contract b4 converting into perm. so in my 1yr contract = 365 days i already left 362 days. i shall cont to count down to the end of my contract. its sad to see that its oni the beginning of my contract and i am starting to count down.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
haiz... faced wif a some comments lately and i am bothered by it.. already demoralised and the more i hear the more i feel demoralised... dunno if anyone will understand how i feel... haiz... probably this is the fact of life which i cant accept at this point of my life...
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Last exam...
I just had my last paper in NUS on the 6th of May. Its a very difficult paper.. so damn hard.. but well its over.. now i am juz crossing my fingers that i can pass my exam and graduate successfully. having mixed feelings now.. 1st i am happy that i am done wif exams but abit worried abt being jobless at the moment. well of course i will be hunting for jobs. hope will be fine..
i am very hapi after my paper bcos dear came to sch to fetch me and brought me for a movie.. well its ironman in GV GOLDCLASS! haha.. yes.. this is reali a pleasant surprise. its reali so comfortable watching movie in goldclass. the service the chair and everything. its a luxury watching movie in such theatre. thanx dear for helping me destress from the examz.
juz glad to have him me as he has been supporting me thru my exam. knowing that i am nervous over my exam he came over the day b4 my 1st paper wif donuts to cheer me on. its all these gesture that makes me feel touched and loved by him. let me know he cares abt me. reali thankful for all the things that he had done for me till now...
THANK YOU DEAR! *woof*
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Quantum mechanics test...
well i studied for the test... i reali did study.. i think i am juz still unsure wif a lot of things... or maybe i am still unfamiliar wif them and thus causing me to do badly for the test.. i think i will be the last few in the class bah... haiz... i dun understand the last ques and till now i am struggling to out how to do.. i used the method the lecturer taught but it juz cant seems to get the ans... i guess there must be some miscommunication somewhere... wanted to ask my friend to teach me... but i guess i better not i shall juz wait for the papers to be returned and wait for the explaination... sadded...
but something happy i went to watch the leap years today... nice show, touching and shed some tears and it gave me alot of thots and feelings... quantum..quantum...
oh yar something happen in sch today.. which made me veri veri pissed off... i am pissed cos someone lied.. yes...lied... i hate being lied to.... hate... y cant 1 juz be truthful... got do means got do... understand means understand.... y need to hide all these? this is not sec sch anymore... no need to act.........haiz...
Friday, February 29, 2008
Sianz..
finding a job is tough when u dun haf the qualification that the company expects... i haf this friend that graf half a yr earlier than us.. she has a degree with merit which is good to me at least... but well.. now companies are all looking for honours student... degree holder seems so unwanted.. this is a very sad thing for me cos i will nv be getting an honours and not even a merit.. so i will be like 1 of the worst degree holder ard...
after this sem.. i will grad from uni... however future seems bleak for me.. i neo i am getting pessimistic... but when everything ard seems to be so bad... its kinda of affecting me... haiz...
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Valentine's Day!!
haha... i think i had a very happy valentine's day this yr..heez.. like all day round surprises..haha.. so happy but at the same time feel abit bad cos dear must haf spent quite abit.. woke up in the morning to do some of my work.. then i heard someone knocking at the door. then i saw the person carrying a big bouquet of flowers. heez.. and its for me!! haha... i am so happy.. 1st time receiving bouquet of flowers and its from dear(sweet passion). heez.. reali so unexpected.. no wonder he kept asking me wat time i am goin out.. haha...then i called him to tell him i received his flowers then i thot thats all.. wait i am not disappointed. in fact i am pretty contented and happy abt it.
so i met him in the evening at central to eat at waraku. heez. nice food. not bad. juz that the sparkling thing abit weird..haha.. then he passed me another present.. its a pair of swarovski earrings!! haha.. i love it!!wanted to watch movie but too many pple watching so we decided to gif it a miss...
though its a short day wif him.. but with all the surprises coming it practically kept me occupy the whole day. thanx dear for giving me such a wonderful time today.. i reali appreciate it... think i will be smiling to slp tonite.. and i hope the flowers will nv die (like real).. haha...
THIS IS THE BEST VALENTINE"S DAY I HAD IN 23 YEARS!!
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Donuts...pasta..
these are the things that i have been craving for quite some time... i think even since exam period... haha... i thot i no longer craving till juz now i went to aunty's blog then i saw donuts!! i like those donuts in her box! haha.. maybe i shd go get myself some soon....can u imagine dreaming to eat pasta during exam period.. haha... wonder when i can go eat..
was suppose to meet aunty they all and cute taryn today.. but when i was abt to go prepare i got this terrible backache... no matter how i lay on bed it juz didnt help... think i am getting old... and i got mosquito bites.. so sad.. so pain and big...
today is eat tang yuan day... ate tang yuan and steamboat.. nice nice... emm nth much to say le...*poof*
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Bad day...
today or rather yesterday i had a bad day... everything seems to be goin the wrong way... my path is not goin smoothly... seeing how i fare from all my tests i am starting to get more and more stress... 1 setback after another...continuous... haiz... i am sad.....
Thursday, November 15, 2007
22nd Birthday..
my 22nd bday juz passed.. received some wishes from friends that actuali remembered my birthday... glad to receive them =D
Ah boi helped me celebrated my birthday on the 10th. when i met him at the train station he immediately handed me the present.. i was trying to guess wat was it and pestering him to gif me clues for it.. actuali he wanted me to open up the present when i reach home but end up we decided to open it up during dinner.. but b4 that we went to watch the game plan at the cathay. then we headed down to raffles place. he was deciding to which place to bring me for dinner. end up we went to sushi tei.. i had soba and he had udon.. and he ordered some kind of soup.. i dunno wat is that call.. then got fresh scallop and crabs..nice nice... then we suddenly crave for some mango dessert..so we went to MOF at marina sq.. they serve nice dessert.. yum yum but the service that day was very bad...BAD.. we waited for quite long.. so sianz.. then after that we went to esplanade to see my fav sea...haha... yar.. like to look at the sea.. makes me feel gd..we had some small talk then left for home..oh yar.. when i opened up the present while waiting for the food.. i am quite surprise..haha..though wif the clues given by him i guessed its a wallet but its the colour that i least expected.. it is orangy in colour..haha.. so i am quite surprise...it came along wif a card.. and he oni allow me to open it when i reached home.. haha..
NUS friends helped me celebrated on the 13th. so sweet of them.. they bought a cake for me which reali caught me by surprise.. cos i was at lvl 4 and they kept asking me to come up to lvl 5.. then i was like thinking wats the prob wif them... cos i waitiing for a person to pass my something then they kept pestering to come up.. so end up i went up and the moment i turned i saw the cake with the candles all lit up... i am so surprised.. made me grin from ear to ear... then claudin passed me a present.. so nice of her to buy the present for me.. reali love the present.. its like a clutch but it can also be slinged over.. MISS ZHUANG!! i shall declare my LOVE for u here as promised.. haha... thanx for the effort! will u marry me? whaha.....(^_^)though exam coming they still took out the time to help me celebrate.. reali touched.. was reali touched..
when 12midnight striked, i received some wishes from friends.. heez.. then throughout the day received a few.. heez... had a test so didnt reali had the mood.. this yr the bday feeling is sort of diff.. i dun feel the same way i felt for bday i had the yrs b4..so i feel quite weird.. after the test went to get my mum her polo tee.. then i studied outside while waiting for ah boi then we went to chinatown to haf dinner.. we had dinner at spring court.. oh my guess wat.. the bill came out to be $426!! so ex!! my god and my bro foot the bill and this is my present from him.. feel quite guilty for letting him foot such ex bill.. cos he is not veri rich.. but he say its alright... we ate shark fin, buddlha jump over the wall, peking duck, chicken, pork ribs,noodles,my parents had dunno wat crab, mango puddling.. think thats abt it.. then my bro asked to send ah boi home which came as a surprise to me.. then after that we headed home.. then i receive present from my mum! its a cute bear and ang bao!haha.. so happy then finali i cut my bday cake juz b4 it stiked 12 midnight which signifies the end of my birthday...
shall post the pic later..heez.. reali thanks those that celebrated for me, showered me wif presents and all the well wishes.. reali appreciate it.. heez..
Friday, November 09, 2007
Love is accepting that your partner is different...
Listening carefully to wat the other half is saying is impt..
Communication is an impt element in a relationship...
Security, assurance, acknowledgement...
Never take love for granted...
Easy to understand yet hard to fulfill...
Monday, November 05, 2007
why bother..dun bother... carry on... juz take everything as it come.. if dun get wat is expected then be it.. y be affected.. y.. time to stop.. time to be clear...
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Weird Dream..
Had a weird dream last nite... after i woke up.. i think abt it.. i am wondering how come i haf such a dream..haha... anyway this will nv happen and i can nv let it happen.. dream is juz a dream..haha...
do not start to do things when something is coming to an end or when u r abt to lose something... things are meant to be done at the correct time.. doing it at the wrong time will make everything seems so meaningless... always cherish wat u haf.....
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Sianz..
feeling veri sianz now... 1st is the damn bloody virus...then now i cant bluetooth anything from my hp to my laptop.. so is there something wrong wif my laptop or my hp... hopefuli is none of it... haiz.. feel like screaming...haiz... feel weird inside me... dunno wats wrong... haiz.......
suddenly feel veri scared that exam is approaching.. bcos i reali dunno how to cope wif it.. i dunno how to study for it... haiz.... HAIZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Chill out!
today lesson suppose to be from 12-4 end up the lect from 2-4 bcame from 2-230.. haha.. dunno y the lecturer still want a lecture.. haha.. so juz nice can go shopping!! whee!! haha.. i bought fancel makeup removal and a dress.. heez.. think i quite like the dress.. heez..think i want to buy a white heels to go wif it... and i am thinking when am i goin to wear it.. emm..... heez.. then i went off at ard 6 to meet my other grp of friends...
been long since i went to chill out.. haha.. enjoyed myself laughing and laughing.. went to cafe del mar in sentosa.. haha.. nice place!! there is a pool in the middle.. and there are different types of seats.. those wif bed.. big cushion.. or those which is juz enuff for 2 pple to cuddle up.. heez..i went there wif my exxon colleague.. reis eveylne daniel and sarah.. haha.its been long since i last saw them.. we had a great time.. haha.. laughed our lungs out.. haha..
but something juz got to spoil this day.. the grp memebers i haf in my grp.. haiz... wats wif them... 1st is the damn indian.. now is another gal.. how can u send an email telling us u updated the report..but didnt even to sms anyone of us to tell us that u changed the report.. when we need to submit the report by 2359 and i oni checked my email at 2340+.. my god. then i haf a hard time goin to the student submission website... my god!! WTH.. VOmit blood.. argh!!
emm...1st day away......
